Exploring ‘Peaking’: The (Almost) Magical Masturbation Technique

Jul 14, 2021
Exploring ‘Peaking’: The (Almost) Magical Masturbation Technique

What if we told you that a simple masturbation technique called peaking could allow you to experience better orgasms, would you try it? Of course! <3

Peaking (a.k.a edging, orgasm control, surfing or teasing) is the practice of bringing yourself to the “peak” of arousal — just before you’re about to climax — then stopping stimulation before starting again. The idea behind peaking is that by repeating this stopand-start pattern, you will reach a heightened state of sexual arousal and experience a more intense orgasm as a result. Research about female empowerment and pleasure shows that 66% of people with vulvas who tried peaking experienced stronger and longer orgasms.

If better orgasms aren’t enough of a selling point already, here are a few more benefits that come with peaking.

1. Peaking helps you have an orgasm. In order to experience more powerful orgasms, you have to be able to climax in the first place. For a lot of women, trying to have an orgasm during sex feels stressful. So much so that only 65% of people with vulvas reach orgasm during heterosexual sex. Building up sexual arousal through peaking and stimulating the clitoris can help women feel more comfortable during intimacy, increasing the chances they’ll have an orgasm.

2. Peaking makes you last longer. In 1956, the Journal of Sexual Medicine published a paper that introduced the stop-and-start method as a treatment for premature ejaculation. The technique, which is essentially what we now call peaking, helps people with penises control their ejaculation. Research shows that men last an average of 5.4 minutes before climaxing during penetrative sex, while it takes women almost three times as long to come. Practicing peaking with the stop-andstart method can help ensure everyone gets their fill.

3. Peaking helps close the orgasm gap. We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: the orgasm gap is real. Because our culture focuses so much on penetration, many heterosexual women struggle to have an orgasm during sex. But the truth is that only 3 to 10% of women are able to orgasm from penetration alone. These numbers stress the importance of clitoral stimulation for people with vulvas. Trying peaking with your partner can help you figure out what you like and close the orgasm gap in your relationship.

4. Peaking increases self-awareness and confidence. Body awareness and knowing what works for you and what doesn’t is at the very heart of peaking. By practicing regularly, alone or with a partner, peaking can help you become more in tune with your senses and desires. The more you get to know what makes you tick, the more empowered you will feel and the better you’ll be able to communicate your desires with your partner.

There are many ways to explore peaking, but no matter which one you try, remember that it is not a race.

Everyone’s body is different, but with time and practice you’ll be able to figure out what works for you. In the meantime, here are a few ways to get started

1. Go at it solo. The most common method used both by people with vulvas and people with penises is the stop-and-start method. It consists of giving yourself a bit of self-love until you etch closer to orgasm, then stopping for about 30 seconds. If you don’t want to stop completely, you can also slow down your movements or focus your attention elsewhere on your body. You want your levels of sexual arousal to drop significantly without going away completely. Repeat this process until you are ready to climax.

2. Use sextoys. People with vulvas might benefit from exploring peaking using a toy that comes with a clitoris stimulation component, built specifically to pleasure the female body. Plus, vibrator models with an easily accessible on/off button like the SKYN Vibes Personal Pleasure Vibrating Massager make it easy to stop and start the stimulation.

3. Do it with a partner. Communication is extremely important when practicing peaking with another person. You need to let the other person know when you have reached your sweet spot and want them to stop. You also want to make it clear when you are ready to orgasm to avoid feeling frustrated that your partner is withholding. During the off moments, ask your partner to shift their focus to other parts of your body like your nipples and your neck.

You can practice peaking for as long as you want, but you should be mindful of disappearing orgasms. This phenomenon can feel like you’ve had a half orgasm or that it completely slipped by unnoticed at the end of a peaking session. Disappearing orgasms can happen when you’ve stopped peaking too soon or if you’ve delayed your orgasm for too long. The good news is that the more you practice and get to know your own body, the more you’ll be able to figure out how to avoid disappearing orgasms and achieve the best orgasm possible.

You’re now officially ready to give yourself a bit of self-love and start peaking… just remember to stop every once in a while. <3


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