The answer to the female orgasm conundrum does not lie in movie sex or mainstream porn, which tends to prioritize male pleasure and includes low representation of oral sex (or other non-penetrative sex) on women.
With so much performative sex readily available at our fingertips, it’s hard not to fall into the trap of unrealistic expectations when it comes to enjoying a real orgasm. So let’s break down the science. For anyone with a vagina, an orgasm is most commonly achieved through stimulation of the clitoris (or clit). A 2017 study revealed that 37% of American women required clitoral stimulation to orgasm, while 66% of women said that they preferred sex when their partner touched their clit. That’s significantly higher than the 18% of participants who said they orgasmed through vaginal penetration alone.
In regard to what happens in your body when you orgasm? Your genital muscles contract and fill with blood while your heart rate increases. Meanwhile, your brain releases feel-good hormones, oxytocin and dopamine, which leads to a feeling of intense happiness. Sounds great, right? Who would want to deny themselves this pleasure?
Pleasure is key when it comes to the female orgasm and a ‘practice makes perfect’ approach can be fun when exploring what works best for you. The clitoris is more complex than we realize and the vulva needs more attention than we tend to give it. If you don’t always achieve an orgasm, that’s ok and perfectly normal! Self-exploration with a SKYN vibrator is a great way to better understand your body, which in turn can help you achieve orgasm through real sex with a partner. So maybe the question to ask is this: what happens when YOU orgasm?