Why do women feel like they have to fake orgasms?

Jul 14, 2021
minutes
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Why do women feel like they have to fake orgasms?

Unfortunately, but unsurprisingly, the reasons are many.

Whether it’s with a saucy one night stand or a delicious partner, most women have faked an orgasm or two in their life. Sometimes they want their partner to feel like they’ve done a good job, other times their vagina simply can’t handle more intense unrhythmic rubbing. They might just want to get it over with or worse, they feel something’s wrong with them if they can’t cum.

But the reason behind all of this is that loads of ladies have been taught to treat their pleasure as something secondary, leaving them at a loss for words when it comes to communicating what they want, need and desire.

While young boys see male masturbation in every other movie, it’s only recently that we’re seeing women make themselves scream on the silver screen.

What does this mean for women faking orgasms?

It means female orgasms are seen as this mythical thing that only wizards of vaginas can summon, and it’s not healthy. Anyone can make a woman climax, with enough communication, possibly some lube and a whole lotta consent.

Even though orgasms are Oh sO lOvely, they’re not the benchmark of amazing sex. You can cum countless times or not even once, that doesn’t change the quality of your experience. If we take the pressure off ourselves and our partners and focus on intimacy, great things can come out of it:

 

  • You might orgasm easier because there is no better feeling than freedom to help you cum
  • Sex becomes whatever you want it to be, allowing you to explore pleasure without the boundaries of orgasming being a box that has to be ticked.
  • You feel more empowered because you decide when you’re satisfied.

When we know our body, we know what we want, and when we’re comfortable, we cum. A study for the Archive of Sexual Behaviour showed that women who are uncomfortable with saying ‘clitoris’ are more likely to fake orgasms. Clearly there’s a connection between feeling awkward talking about your body, and feeling like you have to fake it. Could the answer be saying ‘clitoris’ at least once a day? Beats us, but hey, might be worth a shot.

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