Why you shouldn’t feel ashamed if your genitals don’t look like the ones in porn

Jul 14, 2021
minutes
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Why you shouldn’t feel ashamed if your genitals don’t look like the ones in porn

Now, don’t get us wrong – we know that porn can bring positives to our sex lives. But there’s no denying that it can also be pretty problematic. Especially when it comes to creating some wild and unrealistic expectations about how genitals look.

That’s because a lot of porn features genitals that are often surgically and cosmetically altered. On top of that, you’ll likely find that pubic hair is practically non-existent. This has led to a sex confidence crisis where people are increasingly feeling the need to replicate these so-called perfect genitals, with the number of people seeking vagina or penis surgeries skyrocketing in recent years. It’s even the same in mainstream movie sex, with Hollywood stars all having supposedly perfect bodies and perfect sex most of the time. Real representations remain shockingly hard to come by. And let’s not forget that a lot of porn sex is very much angled towards societal norms, so if you lie elsewhere on the spectrums of gender, sexual orientation or “acceptable” age range, chances are that what you’re seeing on screen is going to make you feel even more alienated.

But here’s thing – reflect on any of your sexual encounters outside the world of porn and you’ll soon realise that these onscreen depictions are not exactly an accurate representation of most of us. Be it penises, vulvas, breasts or testicles… every single person is different. If you want further proof, check out artist Laura Dodsworth who photographed 100 penises and 100 vulvas as part of her Bare Reality project. One quick look at the final pics and you’ll see that the idea of a “normal” penis or “normal” vagina is a total myth!

If you’re feeling like porn is having a negative effect on your body image, you may want to take a little time out and explore some new ways to seek pleasure. Why not try a toy if you haven’t already? If you’re not keen to give up your fave form of visual stimulation just yet, there are also a growing number of offerings that provide an alternative, more realistic narrative than standard porn.

And just remember – sex, be it onscreen or in real life, should always make you feel good!

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